Wednesday, June 21, 2006

somebody out there likes freedom...

how about some good news for a change?

they'd better hurry up. I mean, they'd really better hurry up.

just kidding. it doesn't really matter. we've already built the dossiers, we're just keeping them updated at this point. it's all window dressing to give the impression that us Republicans are strong on domestic civil liberties while we go about our business of Keeping America Safe and protecting the Voters by any means necessary. just ask your own NSA agent; merely speak clearly into your phone, computer screen, television screen, really anywhere you are right now.

and as for Shakespeare and his "crazy" post yesterday, I did some checking with my sources here at the NSA and found no credibility to any of his so-called "facts." in fact, Ted Nugent is not a "deranged nutdigger, fecal variety," whatever the heck that is. no, Mr. Nugent is a Great Patriot, and his unfortunate bodily disfunctions were a symptom of the tragic Communist plot to infect rock stars with a lingering cowardice that still pervades in your "bonos" and their ilk. thankfully for all of us, Mr. Nugent was able to shake off these ill-effects of subversives, clean himself off (mercifully without being killed in some far off war) and produce some great Patriotic music (and some great stories of righteously murdering dangerous animals).

anyway, carry on. nothing to see here. for you.

end transmission

6 Comments:

Blogger anonymous[Tommy, NSA] said...

funny the way I posted as Shakespeare. we can do anything here. man, I love this job.

6:06 PM  
Blogger j.b said...

i noticed that, tommy...then i thought that the NSA finally got to cc and converted him, then i thought that was absurd and they must've killed him and taken over his identity, but that was absurd too because people would notice the quality in his poetry dropping off.

then i thought it was just a hoax perpetrated by the NSA to get us all believing crazy shit.

good one.

6:50 PM  
Blogger j.b said...

oh, and as for all this fascist bullshit you motherfuckers in the NSA are pulling, we are aware.

we are watching.

we are witnesses to the horror.

and it will not be tolerated.

7:01 PM  
Blogger Luis said...

hey, J.B., found a book at the library today, Poetry of the Universe by Robert Osserman. Ever heard of this book?

I think NSA agents have infiltrated the Mexican soccer team. Marquez touched the ball with his hand in his own penalty area and "handed" Portugal the win. He also kept passing to the wrong team, and when he changed his shoes, he just kept playing worse. Bravo kicked his penalty shot into the cosmos. Hawking would have been proud of that.

Chris, you need to watch out for all those Shakespeare sisters out there. Too bad the NSA can't get on Halliburton's ass. Like the Republican Senators, they must be employees of the we(a)k.

8:04 PM  
Blogger j.b said...

never heard of it, Luis....is it any good?

there are a few scientific-minded poets out there...some are very good in fact. it's a rarity, though, for the scientist to be bothered with such things as art and aesthetic pursuits, even though aesthetics and science are so cloesly related.

10:05 PM  
Blogger christopher cunningham said...

listen, Tommy, everything I wrote is accurate and fact-checked, motherfucker. j.b is right, we are watching you my man. and the world turns and babies are born and dick cheney is an asshole.

11:16 PM  

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